The SBEmail Game

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Re: The SBEmail Game

Post by Strong Vader on Fri Jan 22, 2010 11:06 pm

Sorry, Mankiewicz. Already been done (by me) and Uzi's already replied. Here's his, in case you missed it. See above.

Uzi-Bazooka wrote:Well, Strong Vader, thanks for the compliment, but I have to say that your "Onion Lord of the Rings" was the best SBEmail I've ever seen, INCLUDING Strong Bad's own!!

defacessay

STRONG BAD: I look at you all, see the love, there that's E-mailing! While my compe gently weeps...
Dear Strong Bad,
Can you help me with my history essay? "Explain the significance of the Monroe Doctrine and the changes it underwent since its issuance in 1823, limiting your answer to between 500 and 600 words." I don't care, I just don't want to do it.
Your pal,
Captain Spaulding
(reads the essay topic as "blah blah blah, nobody cares, several words" and Captain Spaulding as "A schnorrer")
STRONG BAD: Well, Schnorrm'n. I can write your essay no problem! But...first I have to take care of that The Cheat fire. That I started. A while ago. (he runs from the desk.)

(scene changes to the basement, where The Cheat is tied to a pole that's in a pile of kindling, which is on fire.)
THE CHEAT: MWAAAAAH!
STRONG BAD: Don't worry, little guy! I'll save you...hey, what's this? (picks up a piece of paper from the kindling.) Hey, this would make a GREAT essay! Lemme just add some stuff in here (uses his sharpie marker to deface it just like he did in kids book) Man, this is perfect! I gotta show this to Schnorrm'n! (runs back to the computer room.)

STRONG BAD: Well, here you go, Sp'balding! One essay, totally not defaced by me! Take a looks! (holds it up to the camera as the virtual paper comes up.)


The Gettysburg Address essay about some stuff

Four score and seven lotsa years ago our fathers brought forth on this continent a new nation, essay, conceived in Liberty, and dedicated to the proposition that and this is itll men are created equal.

Now we are engaged in a great civil war, testing whether that nation essay, or any nationessay, so conceived and so dedicated, can long endure get good grades. We are met on a great battle-field of that war known as "school." We have come to dedicate a portion of that field essay, as a final bribe for the teacher resting place for those who here gave their lives that that nation might live. It is altogether fitting and proper that we should do this.

But, in a larger sense, we can not dedicate...we can not consecrate...we can not hallow this ground. The brave men, living and dead, who struggled here, have consecrated it, far above our poor power to add or detract. This really is a good essay, no? The world will little note, nor long remember what we say here, but i hope the teacher does.t can never forget what they did here. It is for us the living, rather, to be dedicated here to the unfinished work which thisessay totally is. who fought here have thus far so nobly advanced. It is rather for us to be here dedicated to the great task remaining before us—that essay. from these honored dead we take increased devotion to that cause for which they gave the last full measure of devotion—that we here highly resolve that these dead shall not have died in vain—that this nation, under God, shall have a new birth of freedom—and that this essay government: of the grade-getting people, by the Strong Bad people, for the teacher people, shall not perish from the earth.

My E-mail:
Dear Ignorant Strong Bad,
My math class is full of middle schoolers who don't know anything. I want to prove to them that even a cartoon character who has never gone to school, like yourself, knows more than they do.
To that end, I present you with this math problem: If you have three apples, and you are given three more apples, but then you lose seven apples, how many apples do you have?
Sincerely,
Mr. Shmidlapp

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It's full of stars.
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Huh. How did I miss that?

Post by It on Mon Jan 25, 2010 2:45 pm

COMPE BACKGROUND: Dangeresque hitting Renaldo with a nunchuck.

{in the style of SSBM} Scroll Buttons VS Email!

Dear Ignorant Strong Bad,
My math class is full of middle schoolers who don't know anything. I want to prove to them that even a cartoon character who has never gone to school, like yourself, knows more than they do.
To that end, I present you with this math problem: If you have three apples, and you are given three more apples, but then you lose seven apples, how many apples do you have?
Sincerely,
Mr. Shmidlapp

Well, Senor Shin-lap, that's as easy as throwing pies at Strong Sad! But, to keep this email from being under a minute long, I'm gonna do it the awesome way. First, take 3 hats!

{Cut to a triangle-split screen with Strong Bad in the center, with Homestar, Coach Z, and Homsar in each corner of the triangle. Strong Bad steals each of their hats}

And add three more! {Homestar, Homsar, and Coach Z disappear, and The KOT, Senor Cardgage, and DJ Teh Cheat appear in their place; Strong Bad takes KOT's crown, Cardgage's toupee, and TC's headphones}

And, take... seven... away? Hmmm. OH! I got it! First, throw all six hats at Strong Sad, {does so} and than take away one more from zero! For this example, I'll use... MY MASK! {Duh duh duh from SB Is In Jail}

{Compé-per comes up, reading: Pleasé, Strong Bad, no}

But, I wasn't done!

{Another Compéper comes up, reading: Too Bad!}

Awww.

{Final Compéper reading: click to email strongbad}

My Email:

Dear Bong Strad,

What is your new years resolution?

your pal,
Homeschool Winner
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Re: The SBEmail Game

Post by Uzi-Bazooka on Sat Jan 30, 2010 8:28 pm

and a happy new year

(the compe's desktop is a picture of Onion Bubs.)
STRONG BAD: (to the tune of "I've got a feeling") Everybody had an E-mail...everybody had good grammar...everybody sent me E-mails...everybody was a spammer...
Dear Bong Strad,
What is your new years resolution?
your pal,
Homeschool Winner

(Read as: Dear...no. Not happening.) (retypes E-mail.)

Dear Strong Bad,
What is your New Years resolution?
Your Slave,
A Home-schooled loser.
STRONG BAD: Well, Mr. Loser, my New Year's Resolution WAS to stop retyping E-mails, but you made that impossible. I guess I have to make a new one now. Unfortunately, I don't really have a lot of experience in these matters. I guess I'll ask my main man and all the time sense-maker extraordinaire: Senor Cardgage.

(cuts to the field, where Senor Cardgage is standing by the stick. Strong Bad walks in.)
STRONG BAD: Hey, Senor Cardgage! What do you know about making resolutions for the New Years?
SENOR CARDGAGE: My besolution, Miranda? Always stank the right tank.
STRONG BAD: Um..yes. Yes, indeed. I guess I'll have to translate this into your language. (clears throat.) I skay, Annalee, parts mine besolution monstrosity year often?
SENOR CARDGAGE: I would ask Coach Z. That guy's ALWAYS making New Year's Resolutions!
STRONG BAD: Aah! (jumps onto the stick, terrified.)

(cuts to the locker room, where Coach Z is talking to Homestar. Strong Bad walks in.)
STRONG BAD: Hey, Coach Z! You have lots of problems, right? You probably know all ABOUT making stupid resolutions!
COACH Z: Well, Strong Bad, I gotta tell ya: making a resolution is like-
STRONG BAD: If the end of that sentence is "a great sports play", than I'm going to be forced to feed you your own jock strap.
COACH Z: Hey, I'm not eating those any more, Strong Bad! That was my New Year's Resolortion!
STRONG BAD: Ugh. (turns to Homestar.) You've been unnaturally quiet, Homestar! I'm sure you're just WAITING for the chance to put your own disgusting two cents in.
HOMESTAR: I'm glad you asked, Mister Strong Bad! Making a New Year's Resolution is easy! All you have to do is ask your girlfriend about what she thinks your worst problems are, and then make a resolution that has ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to do with those problems! Like when Marzipan said I was too stupid and I resolved to learn how to hold my breath for ten minutes! (Homestar inhales, then stays that way until his face turns blue. Then he exhales loudly.)
STRONG BAD: Pfft! This is hilarious! Try it again!
HOMESTAR: Okay...

(the scene darkens as Homestar continues to try to hold his breath.)
STRONG BAD (voiceover): Eventually, I decided to take Homestar's advice and talk to his horrible little broomstick lady.
(cuts to Marzipan's House, where she is making some sort of ethnic food. The ingredients [a box labeled "tofu", a carrot, and a small pile of whatsit] are in front of her, and she is reading a book titled "The Joy of Painting Cooking Gross Ethnic Food." Strong Bad walks in.)
STRONG BAD: So, Marzipan...
MARZIPAN: Ooh, are you here to ask about possibilities for your New Year's Resolution? (looks harshly at him and glares.) Because I've got a freaking list! (rolls out an impossibly long piece of paper.)
STRONG BAD: Um...no? Actually, I came here to...uh...try some of this delicious ethnic food! (takes the carrot and takes a bite.) Yeah...really...great...PREEOW! (he runs off.)
MARZIPAN: Aw, man! That was my last carrot! Oh, well, I guess I can just use carrot-flavored substitute (she pulls out an orange colored pile of whatsit from behind the counter.)

(cuts to the computer room.)
STRONG BAD: So, after that I went back and watched Homestar try to kill himself some more. And it was then that I realized that the point of New Year's Resolutions isn't to MAKE them. The point is to watch other people go crazy trying to FOLLOW them! Well, I hope that answers your dumb question, Loserboy! Because I have to go watch how The King of Town's new "No Butter" resolution is coming along.
(from off the screen, we hear The King of Town screaming loudly.)
THE KING OF TOWN: I CAN'T TAKE IT ANY MORE!
STRONG BAD: Never mind.
(the Virtual Paper comes up.)

Dear That One Guy,
Is it true that you and Senor Cardgage are getting married? If so, congraturations!
For a Certainty,
T.C. Williamson, NYP&RD

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Re: The SBEmail Game

Post by Kinda Long Hair on Sat Jan 30, 2010 9:15 pm

UzAAAYYY wrote:STRONG BAD: (to the tune of "I've got a feeling") Everybody had an E-mail...everybody had good grammar...everybody sent me E-mails...everybody was a spammer...


Ahem. Im going to assume you have the "Let It Be" album. And you probably knew what I meant when I posted those lyrics from Octopus's Garden.

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Re: The SBEmail Game

Post by Uzi-Bazooka on Sun Jan 31, 2010 7:34 am

Actually, I have Beatles Rock Band, but yeah. It has a lot of songs from that album. And doesn't everyone know Octopus' Garden? Seriously?
And, here's the next E-mail for the people who are too lazy to look up two posts.
Dear That One Guy,
Is it true that you and Senor Cardgage are getting married? If so, congraturations!
For a Certainty,
T.C. Williamson, NYP&RD

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Re: The SBEmail Game

Post by It on Sun Jan 31, 2010 8:17 pm

C-H-E-C-K E-minus-M-A-I-L O-N T-H-E C-O-M- Ok, this is gonna take WAY too long {Desktop wallpaper: a half-eaten buffalo wing on top of Strong Mad's head}

Dear That One Guy,
Is it true that you and Senor Cardgage are getting married? If so, congraturations!
For a Certainty,
T.C. Williamson, NYP&RD

{SB reads: Dear That One Guy, Is it true that you and Senor Cardgage are getting-}

No. No way. No. No No No No No No NOOOOOOOOOOO! {Strong Bad runs downstairs, then dashes through the kitchen, then down another set of stairs to the basement, plays TROGDOR II: The Burninater Becomes the Burninatee for a few minutes, then calmly walks back upstairs to the kitchen, and makes himself a bowl of Cheat Commando's...Os. Next, he walks over to his room and goes to bed.}

THE NEXT MORNING, THIS HAPPENED:

{Strong Bad wakes up and goes upstairs to the computer room, and sits on Stooly}

*yawn* Right, now where was I? Oh, yeah. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

SUPER GINORMOUSLY EPICLY DELETED THAT THE COMPE-PER MIGHT NOT MAKE IT OUT OF THIS EMAIL ALIVE!!!!'D

{The Compe explodes, then magically reforms. The Compe voice replys with: Deletéd!}

Phew. That was a close one.

{Compé-per comes up, reading: [url=mailto@homestarrunner.com]click to email strongbad[/url]

MY EMAIL:

Dear Strong Bad,

If Homestar's last name is Runner, what's Homsar's last name?

everyone's favorite knock-kneed waitlifter,
Bob. I mean Dan. I mean Bill. I mean Greg. I mean... Josh.
From New Jersey. I mean Rhode Island. I mean California. I mean... Ontario.
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Re: The SBEmail Game

Post by Uzi-Bazooka on Mon Feb 01, 2010 8:11 am

fifth wall break

STRONG BAD: We're E-mails of the round table, we delete when e'er we're able!

Dear Strong Bad,

If Homestar's last name is Runner, what's Homsar's last name?

everyone's favorite knock-kneed waitlifter,
Bob. I mean Dan. I mean Bill. I mean Greg. I mean... Josh.
From New Jersey. I mean Rhode Island. I mean California. I mean... Ontario.
(reads the extremely long closing as: "lowercase-everyone's least favorite knock-kneed pee-maker, Walter from Pakistan.)

STRONG BAD: Well, Walter Concrete, I don't see why I should be forced into yet another disgusting conversation with Homsar just because you asked me too. My leg's looking better and better every day.
So, I've decided instead to ask the expert on everything Homsar. I am of course talking about...CSD!
(Clover Star Dropper jumps in through the window. She is depicted as a tall human being [female, of course] dressed in camo gear and holding a can of spam.)
CLOVER: Why, hello, Mr. Strong Bad! I'm delighted that you've asked me onto the show.
STRONG BAD: Well, that's great, becau-
CLOVER: NOW WHAT THE CRAP DO YOU WANT WITH ME BEFORE I BITE YOUR KNEES OFF AND DUNK THEM IN SPAM AND EAT THEM?!
STRONG BAD: Yikes, CSD! Don't you think that's a bit VERY over the top?
CLOVER: And for the last time, my name is Switch! SWITCH! SWITCH!!!
STRONG BAD: Okay, Okay. Whatever. Now, listen, Scratch, I need you to tell me what Homsar's last name is.
CLOVER: Oh, yeah. That's easy. His name is Homsar Coffechipwitch.
STRONG BAD: Okay, then. Thank you for your time.
(Clover jumps back out the window.)
STRONG BAD: Yeah, talking with her makes me want to eat my leg too.
(the compe-per comes up.)

Dear Strong Bad:
DO NOT ANSWER THIS E-MAIL
-The GBY

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Re: The SBEmail Game

Post by Sam Fissure on Mon Feb 01, 2010 5:49 pm

answering emails
:I'm checking my email, while my creativity is running dry...

Dear Strong Bad:
DO NOT ANSWER THIS E-MAIL
-The GBY

:Well Green Boy Yassociation, while nothing would make me happier than to not answer your email, I remember the LAST time I didn't answer an email... {Looks off into middle distance}
{Switches to Strongbadia, With Strong Bad wearing a military uniform}
The year was 1982... I was serving in the 5th Strongbadian Regiment, when suddenly the Homestarmy struck!
{Homestar, also in uniform, }
: Chagre!!!! I mean, cargu!!!!! I mean, Cher!!!! I mean...
{Back to computer}
: This lasted for 3 days. Monday rolled by, and I simply forgot the email. Tuesday came, and the US got into a war with Russia, M^3 changed his name, Strong Mad dropped a spoon in the Garbage disposal, Coach Z married Marzipan, and my TROGDOR! machine was sold to the Swiss Queen.
{Clears Screen}
So you see why I have to check my email, or else the world might end. Or at least Google might end. Which would be the worst thing ever to happen to the internet.

Dear Bad,
On a scale of 1 to Chuck Norris, how awesome are you?
Your unbuddy,
Espe Coolperson
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Re: The SBEmail Game

Post by It on Thu Feb 04, 2010 6:23 pm

Dear Bad,
On a scale of 1 to Chuck Norris, how awesome are you?
Your unbuddy,
Espe Coolperson

Wow. Espe? Really? Wow. Anyway, to answer this email and keep it over 3 minutes and 26 seconds so it fits onto 206 Seconds, here we go. NIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINE.

{Compé-per comes up reading: Nine, Espe, Nine out of Norris}

My sb_email:

Dear Strongest of the Bads and Baddest of the Strongs,

Are you gonna make a guest appearence again at the next Limozeen Live concert? If so, what songs are you gonna play?

your second biggest fan,
Christopher Columbus
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Re: The SBEmail Game

Post by Uzi-Bazooka on Fri Feb 05, 2010 8:15 am

edga's hot mom
(The compe's picture is that "Greetings from Depressio Beach" postcard from Somber Vacation.)

STRONG BAD: (to the tune of the Rocky theme): E-e-e-e-mail, E-E-e-e-e-mail...
Dear Strongest of the Bads and Baddest of the Strongs,

Are you gonna make a guest appearence again at the next Limozeen Live concert? If so, what songs are you gonna play?

your second biggest fan,
Christopher Columbus
(reads "appearence" as "appear-eence", and "Christopher Columbus" as "Kristine Columnbutt.")
STRONG BAD: (sultrily) Well, Kristine, I only have one thing to say to a fine lady such as yourself: (harshly, shouting at the e-mail sender) NO, I'M NOT GOING TO ANSWER YOUR NERDY FANBOY REQUESTS TO MAKE ANOTHER VERSION OF THE SAME CRAPPY YOUTUBE VIDEO THAT SUCKED IN THE FIRST PLACE ANYWAY!!!
(clears screen) You guys are always all about re-doing things. "Oh, draw Trogdor again." "Oh, kill Homsar again." "Oh, make another FREAKING LIMOZEEN LIVE CONCERT!!" It drives me crazy!
That's it: I've finally been talked into it.
STRONG SAD (from the other room, so we don't see him): You don't mean...
STRONG BAD: That's right! I'm finally taking Bubs up on his offer: I'm finally going to buy the extremely overpriced EDGA'S HOT MOM "REDO A PREVIOUS TOON SPAM FILTER!"
(Strong Bad walks off, the words "3 hours later" appear, and he comes back.)
STRONG BAD: Okay, lemme just install this on the compe.
(a pop-up window appears, saying "Do you want to install this progrum?")
STRONG BAD: Of course I do! I put it in, didn't I?
(a pop-up window appears, saying "Do you REALLY want to install this progrum?")
STRONG BAD: Um, yes!
(a pop-up window appears, saying "No Foolin'?")
STRONG BAD: No, NO FOOLIN' WHATSOEVER!
(a pop-up window appears, saying "Is this Coach Z again?")
STRONG BAD: NO! THIS IS ME, STRONG BAD, Strongest of the Bads and Baddest of the Strongs!
(a pop-up window appears, saying "Now don't get fresh! Files Deleted!")
STRONG BAD: ARRRGH! I knew I shouldn't have trusted Bubs. Especially the fact that the box for this program has the word "Microsoft" on it. That's pretty mush a guaranteed failure.
(clears screen) Well, Kristine, in answer to your question:
DELETED!
(The E-mail is deleted and the compe-per comes up.)

My E-mail:
D-r S-g B-d,
I heard an ugly rumor. My boring Tuesday School teacher says I should "never tell rumors", or whatever, but I figured I should ask a REAL authority figure for help: you. Can you assist?
Lovingly yours,
Marilyn Balboa, 7-year-old Sultry Babe at large

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Re: The SBEmail Game

Post by Kinda Long Hair on Wed Mar 17, 2010 5:24 pm

Rumor. Part 1

Strong Bad: (to tune of Band on the Run) If we ever get outta here, gonna check all emails, even those terrible ones, just need to delete some, if I ever get outa here.

The Compé's background is a picture of the Lappy with the words "Rest in Peace" under it.


D-r S-g B-d,
I heard an ugly rumor. My boring Tuesday School teacher says I should "never tell rumors", or whatever, but I figured I should ask a REAL authority figure for help: you. Can you assist?
Lovingly yours,
Marilyn Balboa, 7-year-old Sultry Babe at large

SB: (reads email. Reads "D-r S-g B-d" as "Drstruginer... drsbineder... Dr. Strangelove" and reads "7-year-old Sultry Babe at large" as "Not even old enough to read at all")

{clears scree}

SB: Well, youngin, I wouldn't know, since no one dares to tell rumors about me! So.... I guess i'll see you later.

{cut to the Stick. Homestar is standing there.}

Homestar: If you even try to come near me, your gonna get a fist full of face!

{SB walks in}

HR: Hey Strangelove. {suddenly sad} Oh, Im so sorry for your loss.

SB: A: Don't call me that, and B: What are you talking about?

HR: {crying} I bought you this {pulls out a package roughly the shape of Homsar} I hope it'll ease the pain!!!! {runs off, crying}

SB: What was that.

Package: Dahahaha, hopin' I can bring the joy back.

SB: {jumps} WAHH! {chunks package}

Package: {growing quieter} Sure beats breakin' up with me......

SB: I gotta figure what this is all about!

Bubs walks up.

Bubs: Hey Strong Bad, I don't mean to take advatage of ya while your down, But I'm sellin' burial sites for 100$ a square inch, if your interested.

Cut to the steep deep. Homestar's sled + epithat is pushed into the ground as a tombstone. A piece of paper is taped over the sled reading "for rent." The sound that the bad graphics ghost makes is heard. Cut back to the stick.

Bubs: Oh, by the way. You still owe me a couple hundred dollas for that "Edga's Hot Mom-ware" you bought last email.

fade to black. Strong Sad appears. The action cool news 5 logo appears in the bottom right.

SS: Hello, fellow citizens of Free Country, USA. As we all know, Strong Bad has suffered a terrible loss...

cut to show SB asleep on the couch. A bag of Potate is over his head.

SS: (from TV) I have set up a donation account at Bub's Concession Stand.

Sb wakes up, during that sentence and sits up.

SS: (from TV) Please help our favorite son, and donate. And God bless us all, everyone.

TV: We now return to "The Death Truck!"

TV: I think that truck's trying to kill me. (aty the Same time as Strong Bad's line) It's the same truck that tried to kill my Dad. It almost killed my dog last week. (braking tires is heard)

SB: Well, I guess that rules out Strong Sad's death, but I think he's had a grave reserved for the better part of ten years.

cut to the graveyard. There is a tombstone reading "Here lies Strong Sad. Died 2000 2001 2002 2003 2004 2005 20006 2007 2008 2009 2010?"

cut back to the Compé The Cheat comes in and clicks on an icon on the desktop reading "file09.txt"

A text document comes up reading "To be continued"

RUMOR. PT 2

cut to the Cheat's coputer room. The cheat is typing. Strong Bad comes in.

SB: The Cheat, what do you know about all this?

The Cheat: meh meh

SB: Oh, so you don't know nothin' about nothin' eh?

The Cheat: meh me.

SB: You only know that you didn't start the rumor, eh?

The Cheat: Meh!

SB: Okay.

cut to Strong Mad's room. SB walks in.

SB: Hey Strong Mad! What do you know about this?

SM: COMPUTER!

SB: What?

SM: SO SORRY! I GOT YOU A PRESENT! (hands SB a rectangular box, which looks old a decrepid.)

SB. Oh, um... thanks?

SM: OPEN IT!!!

SB: Umm....... okay

SB peels off a small opens up the box, to see the horrible painting.

SB: Wahh! (quickly slamms the box closed) Strong Mad, is this some kind of cruel joke?!?!?!

cut to the compé SB walks in and clicks on the "file09.txt" icon. He higlights the "To be continued" and types over it.

SB: Lets see here, apparently this has something to do with my computer. (types computer) But Which one? (type which one?) I guess I'll just have to ask.......

cut to Strong Sad's room. SB walks in.

SB: Hey, Hot Tub. I

SS: Oh, I was gonna come find you. I have your money from the donations! {hands SB a quarter} You wouldn't believe the public outcry! Some guy called Strong Vader sent in $1000, Abdi Larue sent $20. Ali and her sister sent 100$ each. 1st grade girl who could beat you up sent 10 $ and a note saying "Without a computer, I can't send you threatening emails!"

SB: Wait, than why do I only get 25 cents?

SS: Bubs said something about taxes.

SB: Really? Let me see something that says that!!!!!

Strong Sad hands Strong Bad a reciept that reads:


Donations:
2053$
Deduction: 2052.75$
reason: uhhhhhhhhhh... TAXES! yeah, that'll work

SB: This is bull talk! Im marchin' my shiny white bwathon and talkin' to the man in charge.

Cut to the field. It's late evening. Marzipan is standing there. SB walks in

Marzipan: Hey, Strong Bad. Sorry about your loss. Your computer just randomly exploded. I personly blame the shabby manufacturers who opperate in a eco-damagin factory.

SB: What? So thats what this is all about.

cut back to the comé

SB: (typying, back on the email) Well Roculum, If there's one thing I know, it's that to make it a non rumor, you gotta do what it says! So lets just take some of Strong Mad's home-made fireworks, here. (pulls out a bottle filled with gasoline and a battery with a rope comming out the top.) And a little of this. (lights the rope)

Cut to the outside. A saturn-ring explosion happens, exactly like in "Hremail 3762"

cut back to the computer room. where the entire area around the desk is charred, but the computer and desk remain unhurt. There is a blue screen on the compé

EXPLOSION ALERT!
Built in to your shabbily-produced computer is a state of the art explosion deflector. It deflects the explosion away from the computer and towards you! Hope you survived, kid.

SB: (burnt exactly like in gimmicks) Holy crap! Why can't my computer just learn to love the bomb? Oh well, maybe this can still work.

cut to Bub's Concession stand. SB walks up with the Compé, which still has the explosion screen on it. SB sets it on the counter.

Bubs: Hey, Strong B'd. Have you decided on the grave, yet?

SB: No Bubs, I think my computer is salvagable! What do you think?

Bubs: Hmmmm. I'll have to put it through a test. (pulls out a hammer and starts hitting the compé)

SB: Bubs, what are you doing?

The Compé is now heavily damaged. Bubs stops hitting it.

Bubs: I can fix it, but it aint gonna be cheap!

SB: Okay, now what about the "takes" on the donations?

Bubs: New law! You don't want the IRS hunttin ya down, do ya Strong Bad?

SB: Well, no but...

Bubs: (interrupting) Ten you don't question it!

cut back to the computer room. SB come in with the Tandy 26 Hundred (remember that from before it was locked on the HRwiki forum? No? We never killed it off, and now it can shine again!)

SB sets it on the desk and turns it on. The Tandy logo appears onscreen.

SB: Man, Im sure glad I didn't kill this computer, yet! At least it has a good idiot filter!

On the computer, The logo has been replaced with a bar that says "Turning On"

A title card comes up that says "Two Hours Later"

It's dark in the computer oom. SB is sleeping on the stool. The "Turning On" bar is at 99% and goes to 100 with a ding, which wakes Strong Bad up.

SB: Woah. Maybe I should finish this email. (brings up the email program) Well, whoever, I think this email might maybe answer you qestion. See ya later. Man, the beefed up idiot filter on this should block more stupid emals.... I wonder if that SV guy is still blocked....

PM EASTER EGG IDEAS.
Easter Eggs:

Click on idiot filter to bring up one of the blocked emails.

Dear Strong Bad,
When is your next Numba 1 jam coming out? What will it be called?
Your friend,
Strong Vader
PS: Palpatine wants a tennis rematch.
PPS: I warned him, he's no match for your style.


Click on SV guy to bring up a toon with SV, 1st Grade girl, and Abdi LaRue drawn like teen girl squad

There is a table with the people sitting around it. SV and Abdi LaRue are wearing delethead hats. (remember, 1st grade girl looks like Chizuko from TGS 15 who has a badge that says "Hi, My name is crap for brains first grader who could beat up strong bad)

SV: I sent tons of money! Sbemails should be back up, anytime now!

Abdi: w00t!

1st grade girl: I can start threatening him some more!

SV and Abdi glare at 1st grade girl.

SV: Hiw dare you attend the official delethead meeting! be gone!

1st grade girl: (starts to cry)

SV: Aw peas. (runs off)

Abdi: (follows SV)





my email

Dear Strong Bad
Where did Senor Cardgage come from? What was he like when you were little. Did you think he was awesom even then?
Yours
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

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Re: The SBEmail Game

Post by Uzi-Bazooka on Mon Mar 22, 2010 7:27 am

major points

STRONG BAD: (coming in and sitting down) Stupid...Sam and Max...winning the vote...getting all up in my grill...GRRRRrrrRRRR!
(He turns on the compe. The desktop picture shows Sam and Max.)
STRONG BAD: ARRGH! DELETED!
(He deletes the desktop and changes it. It now looks like the logo for SBCG4AP: For Freaking Mac!)
STRONG BAD: There you go! These creepy forum fanboys sure know how to handle sweet, sweet style.

Dear Strong Bad
Where did Senor Cardgage come from? What was he like when you were little. Did you think he was awesom even then?
Yours
MMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
(reads "Dear Strong Bad" as "Dear Missing Comma at the end of this statement", "What was he like as you were little" as "What was it like when this statement was missing a question mark at the end?", "awesom" as "oh-wee-some", "Yours" as "Still Missing a Comma", and "MMMMMMMMMMMMMMM" as "Fhqwgads Wannabe.")

STRONG BAD: Fhqwannabe, this is the WORST E-mail I've EVER received! I mean, you make Hremail 2057 look good! Seriously, man! The least you can do is try! Let's look at the major mess-ups you made:
(cuts to Strong Bad in front of the blackboard like he is in "technology." He writes on the board as he talks.)

Numba 1: Severe Lack Of Commas. This is related to Numba two, which is:
Numba 2: Way Too Many Spelling And Grammar Errors. Don't get me wrong, I like making fun of you guys. But you make it too easy, man, too easy!
Numba 3: Forgetting To Include The Sum Of At Least 5 Bucks Within Your E-mail. This isn't a real point, I just wish that...that more of you people would send me money from time to time. (clears throat.) Moving onwards:
Numba 4: Rehashing An Already Done E-mail. While I may not have covered all the details of Senor's life, everything we know about this strange and oh-wee-some creature is already documented in "kind of cool."
Numba 5: Rehashing An Already Done Signature. Isn't that right, Fhqwannabe?
(stops writing on the board.) All of this equals one thing (scribbles some random mathematics on the board.) Numba one, plus Numbas 2, 3, 4, and 5, equals...
DELETED!
(He waits. A tumbleweed floats by.)
Lemme try this again I said DELETED!
(Again, nothing happens.)
Stupid...low-rate...badly produced...electronics...
(He walks back to the computer room)
DELETED!

(The Compé finally complies with a good graphics animated explosion and the word "DéLéTéD!")

STRONG BAD: Finally! That was worth the awesome wait, though. Do that again! (Hits the Delete key.)
Compé: no.
STRONG BAD: Awww, man! Compé, I think you're failing on several major points. (He runs back to the chalkboard. We stay looking at the computer as the compé-per comes up.)

Easter Eggs:
Click on the Compé after the paper comes up to see the chalkboard with the Compé's five major points written on it.
Numba 1: Difficulty Following Orders.
Numba 2: Tendency Towards Rabbitdog And Bunnym'n.
Numba 3: Forgetting To Include At Least Five Bucks In Your Disc Drive.
Numba 4: Rehashing Already Used Paper Noise.
Numba 5: Low-Quality Idiot Filter (Tell Mr. MMMMMMMMMMMMMMM to LEAVE ME ALONE!)

Numba 1 + Numbas 2, 3, 4, & 5 = Selling Back to Bubs.



Dear Creator Of Trogdor, Ruler of All Lands, Master of Style, And So On And So Forth:
My Aunt and Uncle were late with their "Decemberween" present. They gave it to us in March. And it was just a stupid board game! What the pfargtl? And I can't tell my parents 'cause they're all "They're just married, cut them some slack", yada yada yada. So I figured I'd talk to someone with MULTIPLE brain cells. Unfortunately, you were the only one available. You'll be all right, I guess.
Anyways...
Yours In Valor,
Thomas Bazooka

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Re: The SBEmail Game

Post by Kinda Long Hair on Mon Mar 22, 2010 4:00 pm

Your email had one major problem with it.

Your email wrote:He turns on the compé

While the emial before it

previous email wrote:Bubs: Hmmmm. I'll have to put it through a test. (pulls out a hammer and starts hitting the compé)

The Compé is now heavily damaged. Bubs stops hitting it.

Bubs: I can fix it, but it aint gonna be cheap!


and


cut back to the computer room. SB come in with the Tandy 26 Hundred (remember that from before it was locked on the HRwiki forum? No? We never killed it off, and now it can shine again!)

SB sets it on the desk and turns it on. The Tandy logo appears onscreen.

SB: Man, Im sure glad I didn't kill this computer, yet! At least it has a good idiot filter!

On the computer, The logo has been replaced with a bar that says "Turning On"

A title card comes up that says "Two Hours Later"

It's dark in the computer oom. SB is sleeping on the stool. The "Turning On" bar is at 99% and goes to 100 with a ding, which wakes Strong Bad up.

SB: Woah. Maybe I should finish this email. (brings up the email program) Well, whoever, I think this email might maybe answer you qestion. See ya later. Man, the beefed up idiot filter on this should block more stupid emals.... I wonder if that SV guy is still blocked....

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Re: The SBEmail Game

Post by Uzi-Bazooka on Mon Mar 22, 2010 5:34 pm

Okay, fine! Here is the Supra-DVD of the Deleted Scene of SBEmail game Numba 902: major points. This scene was originally supposed to be at the beginning of the E-mail, but was left out because I hadn't made it yet thought it ruined the "pacing."


PLAY THE SCENE:

(Strong Bad is standing at Bubs' Concession Stand. Bubs is in the back.)
STRONG BAD: Bubs! How long until my computer is fixed?
BUBS: Could be years, Strong Bad! I'm working on a completely unrelated side project right now!
STRONG BAD: Oh, that is IT, Old Man Bubs! I'm gonna get Strong Mad and clean this place out!
(Cuts to a scene where Strong Bad and Strong Mad are mopping up the floor of Bubs' Stand, dressed in maid outfits.)
STRONG BAD: Oh, yeah. I finally got that nasty little grease spot out!
STRONG MAD: I ATE IT!!!
(Bubs walks in.)
BUBS: Good work, boys! Rather than paying you, I've decided too give you your already-fixed Compe without even charging you extravagant sales tax!
(Strong Bad takes the Compe and rips off his maid outfit.)
STRONG BAD: Sweet lady Compe! Let's make out! I'm gonna start checking E-mails on you right away!
(He runs off-screen.)

STORYBOARDS:


DELETED SCENES:
1. (There is a full-length montage set to "Because, It's Midnight" showing Strong Bad and Strong Mad cleaning the entirety of Bubs' stand. It takes about ten minutes. Words appear at the end):
"We deleted this scene because some moms whined about having a heavy metal song. What losers!"
2. (It shows the scene as depicted in the storyboards, with Strong Bad killing Bubs. Words appear):
"Whiny moms again. Isn't that always the way?"
3. (It shows the scene as depicted in the storyboards, but with a whiny mom standing in for Bubs. Words appear):
"We tried to get revenge on the whiny moms, but then they shut us down anyway. That's why this scene took so long to make and not because Uzi didn't think of it at all! We swear!"

COMMENTARY:
UZI-BAZOOKA: Hey, I'm Uzi-Bazooka. I was going to have Strong Bad in the booth with me, but we couldn't afford him. Instead, I got a slightly different Homestar Runner character.
HOMSAR: DAAAaaaAAAAaaAAAAH! I've been deleted from the devil's playhouse of the DoomGuy!
UZI-BAZOOKA: Yes, yes. Quite. (coughs.) Anyway, this is the scene I made to tell Movie Magic Man why I had the Compe in this SBEmail, even though his lousy fan-fiction killed it off! I liked the Compe!
HOMSAR: Twitter of Michael Abrams! Paging the BFG!
UZI-BAZOOKA: Why, yes. I AM a Big Fun Guy. Thank you for saying so, Homsar!
HOMSAR: DAAAaaAAAaaAAAH! I'm the partridge in the fa-
UZI-BAZOOKA: We're out of time!

SCENE SELECTION:
There's only one scene, stupid!

And, for those of you who can't remember, this is the next E-mail to be checked:
Dear Creator Of Trogdor, Ruler of All Lands, Master of Style, And So On And So Forth:
My Aunt and Uncle were late with their "Decemberween" present. They gave it to us in March. And it was just a stupid board game! What the pfargtl? And I can't tell my parents 'cause they're all "They're just married, cut them some slack", yada yada yada. So I figured I'd talk to someone with MULTIPLE brain cells. Unfortunately, you were the only one available. You'll be all right, I guess.
Anyways...
Yours In Valor,
Thomas Bazooka

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Re: The SBEmail Game

Post by It on Sun May 02, 2010 1:22 pm

(What color text does the Tandy 2600 have? I'll make it green for now)

SB: Oh, E-mail's in the backyard grillin' some steeeeeeeak.
Dear Creator Of Trogdor, Ruler of All Lands, Master of Style, And So On And So Forth:
My Aunt and Uncle were late with their "Decemberween" present. They gave it to us in March. And it was just a stupid board game! What the pfargtl? And I can't tell my parents 'cause they're all "They're just married, cut them some slack", yada yada yada. So I figured I'd talk to someone with MULTIPLE brain cells. Unfortunately, you were the only one available. You'll be all right, I guess.
Anyways...
Yours In Valor,
Thomas Bazooka

SB: *sigh* Listen, man, I couldn't care less. My email account is not a place for complaints about how lame your hot mom is.



{Envelope Paper comes down}


MY EMAIL:

Dear Strong Bad,


Draw Trogdor again, but this time design him in the shape of a D, for Dragon.
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Re: The SBEmail Game

Post by It on Sun May 02, 2010 7:16 pm

BUMP!
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Re: The SBEmail Game

Post by Sam Fissure on Sun May 02, 2010 8:35 pm

Dear Strong Bad,
Don't you just hate it when Gordon Gravedigs?
You unbuddy,
Sam Fissure
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Re: The SBEmail Game

Post by It on Mon May 03, 2010 3:17 pm

Sam Fissure wrote:Dear Strong Bad,
Don't you just hate it when Gordon Gravedigs?
You unbuddy,
Sam Fissure

That's not how the game goes. I already made up an email. You're supposed to answer it and then state your own email. My email was:

Strong Bad,

Draw Trogdor again, but this

time design him in the shape
of a D, for Dragon.
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Re: The SBEmail Game

Post by It on Mon May 03, 2010 6:59 pm

BUMP! Don't let this game die! It WAS the sole purpose of this forum!
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Re: The SBEmail Game

Post by Uzi-Bazooka on Mon May 03, 2010 7:29 pm

pretzel'd!

STRONG BAD: {sitting down at the Compe which I brought back so quit trying to resurrect the Tandy-Whatever} I've got a chatbox in my pocket, and I think it's starting to melt.

Strong Bad,
Draw Trogdor again, but this
time design him in the shape
of a D, for Dragon.
{He gets as far as"Draw Trogdor again", then stops.}

STRONG BAD: You're kidding me, right? I mean, I know you guys have no life, but I thought you had more of a life than THIS! Come on, guys! You'd have to be a total idiot to answer this!

{Homestar walks in}

HOMESTAR: Hey, Strong Bad! I'm here to return your little brother! He smells like old apricots.

STRONG BAD: Oh, yeah. A punch to the head or two usually fixes that up.

HOMESTAR: Punch?! How?!

STRONG BAD: Well, how about I go punch Strong Sad, while you answer this E-mail for me?

HOMESTAR: O-kay! {He sits down as Strong Bad leaves} Dear Homestar: Draw Trogdor again, but this time, draw him in the shape of a D for Dragon. Um...no name or anything? I'll just assume your name is FishFace McGrew. {clears screen}
Well, FishFace, I could draw something in the shape of a letter D! But why a Dragon? {angrily} This is the 20th Century and we can draw whatever we dang well please! {calmly} And...I've had a real craving for pretzels lately. So...I'll draw that. {He starts drawing something on a piece of paper with his yellow crayon. Strong Sad walks in.}

STRONG SAD: No, stupid! That's not a "D"! That's an "S"! And that looks more like a dragon than a pretzel.

HOMESTAR: Really? {We see the picture, which is Strong Bad's original picture of Trogdor. Homestar throws it away and tries again.} How's this?

STRONG SAD: About as well as can be expected from such a sh-

{Strong Bad runs in, brandishing his nunchuk gun}

STRONG BAD: DIE!! {He smacks Strong Sad repeatedly as The Virtual Paper comes up.}

EASTER EGG:
Click on the nunchuck gun at the end to see Homestar's picture:


Dear Strong Bad,
I am thirteen years old and still not allowed to say the words you use. Like "Holy Crap." Or "Marzipan."
I was wondering, when you were my age, how did you get around the words that your parents banned?
Sincerely Yours Truly Your Friend Crapfully Yours,
The New Uzi-Bazooka

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Re: The SBEmail Game

Post by It on Mon May 03, 2010 7:56 pm

STRONG BAD: Na, na, la, la la, hey hey, E-mail
Dear Strong Bad,
I am thirteen years old and still not allowed to say the words you use. Like "Holy Crap." Or "Marzipan."
I was wondering, when you were my age, how did you get around the words that your parents banned?
Sincerely Yours Truly Your Friend Crapfully Yours,
The New Uzi-Bazooka

(reads signature as: Carpfully mine, The New Dangeresque Too)

STRONG BAD: Heh, parents. You're funny, Bazooka. Wait, since when was "Marzipan" considered profanity? Isn't it, like, some sort of candy or something? Anyways, considering the fact that my cough, cough, parents never gave a toot about what me and my brothers say, we simply did what we wanted and beat what we don't like. {clears screen} But, why not go into history about how I found out about the word, "crap". It all started December of 1986...

{a younger-looking Strong Bad is standing next to younger-looking brothers, as well as a smaller version of the cheat with a small pacifier in its... "mouth" in the Field}

YOUNGER-LOOKING STRONG BAD: So, you guys, what's the good word?

YOUNGER-LOOKING STRONG SAD: Well, our classmates at school are using that new phrase the Whatever-Generation-Comes-Between-Prince-and-King of town's Poopsmith made up.

YOUNGER-LOOKING STRONG BAD: Since when does the Poopsmith make things up when he never speaks?

THE POOPSMITH: {holds up a sign saying: Holy Crap!}

YL SB: Holy Crap, huh?

{cut back to the Tandy 2600}

STRONG BAD: So that's where it comes from, Uzi. Tune in next week where Homestar goes two emails back to back with no appearences!

{Envelope Paper comes down}



My Email:

Dear Stong Bad,

What would it take for you to go out with Marzipan? Y'know, when you take away the whole "hippy" thing and add some arms and legs, she's actually kinda hot in the right light.

See ya,
Homeschool Winner
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Re: The SBEmail Game

Post by These are my saturdays on Tue May 04, 2010 12:16 am

Gordon Tiecollarondemos wrote:BUMP! Don't let this game die! It WAS the sole purpose of this forum!
You know, besides Thy Dungeon Man.
Also, this place seems to have grown farther from this game a bit; TDM is far more casual.
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Re: The SBEmail Game

Post by It on Tue May 04, 2010 6:02 pm

turntechGodhead wrote:
Gordon Tiecollarondemos wrote:BUMP! Don't let this game die! It WAS the sole purpose of this forum!
You know, besides Thy Dungeon Man.
Also, this place seems to have grown farther from this game a bit; TDM is far more casual.

Define casual.

PS: BUMP!
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Re: The SBEmail Game

Post by Uzi-Bazooka on Tue May 04, 2010 6:54 pm

Thy Dungeonman is usually one-two sentence posts, responded to by a simple two-word command like "EAT PIE" or "KILL GIRLFRIEND." This here SBEmail game requires actual effort.

Though I don't think your two-paragraph things can be called "real effort," Gordon. Would it kill you to get a little more involved (no offense)? And you're forgetting that you have to add a title at the top underlined and bolded.

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Re: The SBEmail Game

Post by Falcon Paunch on Sun Jul 04, 2010 6:09 pm

(LOL, this is kinda long)

going out

STRONG BAD: {singing} Ooooooh, email email email email emaaaaail! Email is better than apple pie!

Dear Stong Bad,

What would it take for you to go out with Marzipan? Y'know, when you take away the whole "hippy" thing and add some arms and legs, she's actually kinda hot in the right light.

See ya,
Homeschool Winner

STRONG BAD: For the last time, Nerdschool, I'm not going out with Marzipan. Now step back before your email gets DEL-

{cut to a view of The Cheat and Strong Bad together in the computer room}


THE CHEAT: {The Cheat noises}

STRONG BAD: Wait, WHAT?

THE CHEAT: {The Cheat noises}

STRONG BAD: I'm not going to let you do that!

{The Cheat pulls out a golden watch and swings it back and forth}

STRONG BAD: {sounding sleepy} Not... going... to... let you... {falls asleep}

{Cut to Strong Bad asleep outside Marshmallow's Le'st Stand}

STRONG BAD: {awakens, yawns} Woah. I feel... weird.

MARZIPAN: {walks on-screen} Time for our date, Strong Bad!

STRONG BAD: I feel strangely compelled to be happy about this.

{Cut to Strong Bad and Marzipan eating salad inside Marshmallow's Le'st Stand}


STRONG BAD: {clears throat} For a reason I will never understand, I have had a great time so far.

MARZIPAN: Great, Strong Bad! Now, how do you feel about pets?

STRONG BAD: Oh, totally unfair. They're just animals! They did nothing to deserve being enslaved like that!

{After saying this, Strong Bad looks around, as if trying to figure something out.}


MARZIPAN: Yes! Unfair in every way imagina-

STRONG BAD: Wait, hold on. Why am I, of all people, acting like you, of all people?

MARZIPAN Well, the Cheat did say you've been looking forward to this a long time. I bet you've seen the light, and didn't even realize it was different for you.

STRONG BAD: I... don't think that's it.

MARZIPAN: Well, what do you think?

STRONG BAD: Hold on...

{Pause}

{Cut to a blurry version of the scene with The Cheat and Strong Bad together}

STRONG BAD: {distorted} -AT?

THE CHEAT: {distorted The Cheat noises}

STRONG BAD: I'm no- {the scene skips, as if a portion has been removed} do th-

{the scene skips again, The Cheat is waving his watch}


STRONG BAD: {distorted and sleepy-sounding} -oi- {scene skips} -t you...

{cut back to Strong Bad and Marzipan}

STRONG BAD: I gotta go. {gets up and leaves}

{cut to Strong Bad running into the Computer Room}

STRONG BAD: {worried} The Cheat, you've turned me into some tofu-loving hippie! Now turn me back to normal before I end up marrying Marzipan!

THE CHEAT: {The Cheat noises}

STRONG BAD: {angry} What do you mean, you don't know how to reverse it?

THE CHEAT: {The Cheat noises}

STRONG BAD: I- you- Marzipan-

THE CHEAT: {The Cheat noises}

STRONG BAD: {angry} THERAPY?!

{The Compe-per comes up}

STRONG BAD: Hey!

(My email)

Dera Strongbad,

What is 20x6 Strong Sadl iek?

incerly,

Mark
RI
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Straight (Wo)Man
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